It’s true!
We don’t mean having a bigger brother will make teens better drivers. We mean having a technological spying gadget installed in your car (a la “Big Brother” in the George Orwell novel “1984″ or the lackluster CBS reality show).
This hot, new device is called the ‘TIWI’. It’s a dash-board mounted doo-hickey the size of a GPS unit that plugs into the power source in your car’s console. It tracks teen drivers using GPS, records unsafe speeding and braking, illegal u-turns and inconsiderate behavior at drive-thru windows.
Take a look! This is a TIWI!
Studies have shown teenagers are 90% safer when a TIWI is installed in their car. They use seat belts more often and, in some cases, are encouraged to snack on healthy foods like sunflower seeds, dried apricots, honey glazed apple slices and organic sun nuggets.
In a related story, Tony Infantino is rejoining the punk-metal fusion band from his early days, “The Organic Sun Nuggets”.
Bottom line: TIWI’s save lives! And cost about $300. If you’re so excited about it why don’t you visit the website and get one. And if you like it that much, why don’t you just marry it? Jeesh!
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